The Bumps

It seems like every time I turn around there is another loose end hanging out there. This week it was some website stuff. I get an email or text asking for something, respond and then don't hear back. It's just plain rude. Somehow I feel like I want to help put this stuff to bed, but A's lack of common decency to get back to me is astounding.

She has built events of the past up in her mind so much, that we did not even go through the same break-up. It's amazing. I know that I was desperate to not lose her, to lose our life, my family, my home and every other fucking thing....BUT the accusations are seriously over the top. It sort of makes me wonder about the severity of certain issues that she shared with me. Not that those things didn't happen, but more about the degree.

I've been using affirmations to keep me going. At points where I feel myself slipping down the hill, I just keep saying them over and over and over and over. I hope that at some point, my heart will believe them.